Why do I have to agree with everything that some one else tells me? Why can’t I have ideas of my own?? People always have to judge me and they think I have to match up to some body else. I am sure my parents and in-laws did a fabulous job of raising kids and managing everything. Why am I being judged if I do not want to be like my mom or my mil? Why am I judged if I want to be like them? I have my own ideas about raising kids, managing the house, managing the finances….. If some one does not agree with my ideas, let them talk to me about it and hear me out. Let them tell me what their ideas are… I am not saying I will listen to them and agree with them but, hey at least talk to me. Don’t get mad at me just because I said something that you think is not correct.
The only two people who accept me for who I am are my little boys. I am sure that too will change eventually. Even today, men feel the need to control their wives and parents feel the need to control their children and some people think they have to do things the way their parents did. I can change some of my ways for the people I love. No question about that and I have already done that and expect the same from people close to my heart. There is nothing wrong in that. The part that concerns me is, if I say something that people don’t agree with, why can’t they come and talk to me? Why do they have to stay shut and think everything will be back to normal? Do they think I will forget about it? Why?? It is in this world, that I strive to raise two boys – who I hope will understand people better and will learn that respect for each other comes only when you truly understand the other person and let them be themselves.
It is on these days, that I am truly happy to be able to come to work away from the chaos of the home. That drive to work gives me some time alone with my thoughts and sometimes makes me see things in perspective. I am not saying that I love my job but at least it gets me away from all the hustle-bustle and gives me some thing else to do so that I am a sane person when I go to pick up the kids. I just wish things would change and we can let people make their own decisions and not judge them!
PS: Sorry, I just had to rant to keep my sanity!